"Pretty Girls Rock!"
"Now I lay me down to sleep...."
"Hello World!"I looked at you this morning and I said to myself,
"I'm a new mommy to a 1-month-old bundle of baby girl joy."
I said that, smiled and then paused.
My life will be filled with daily blessings of juicy kisses, the smile that melts your heart, the touch of a little hand that lets you know that life is truly a gift from God and the eyes that makes you wanna fall in love over and over again.
Again, I pause.
My life will also be filled with sleepless nights, countless bottles, laundry, little socks (that go missing), cries, poopy diapers and uncertainties about my parenting skills.
Gone are the days when my biggest concern was what I would eat tonight, or what my bestfriend and I were going to be doing for the weekend, or what movie to see--the latest black love story.....etc.
I never would have imagined that my life would be so fixated and consumed with coupons for diapers...or reading the labels on formula cans...reading up on the latest recalled baby items or researching which shots we can do without and worrying about which bottles to buy and if I should put them in the microwave or not.
Let's not even mention that going shopping now means bypassing the cute outfit and matching shoes in the store window. Now, it's a beeline to Carters or Osh Kosh, Old Navy (again not for me), Baby Gap and Target is a marathon adventure spent mostly in the Baby section perusing the baby necessities -- man you are growing so fast.
Again, I pause.....and a smile fills my face.
You know what......I don't mind the change one bit and wouldn't trade it for the world.These are the feelings and blessings for which you can never be prepared.
Zuri...you are the joy in my heart....the laughter in my soul.....the calm in my storm. When I have bad thoughts or an overly emotional day, you remind me not to sweat the small stuff because there are much bigger things in this world. You are such a ray of sunshine. You bring so much meaning to a world and life that was once so confusing. You have given me purpose--a drive beyond compare.
Even in the midst of all the confusion about being a first time mom, doubting my abilities to care for such a fragile life and hoping and praying to God that I don't screw up your life(lol)......I know that all you want and need from me is to cuddle you when you cry and give you tons of 'mommy-kisses'. You don't ask for much and you don't expect me to be perfect and I can't expect to be perfect either. We're both in this baby training camp together and we'll make it through just fine...
1 month down....and a lifetime to go!....Mommy loves you Zuri.b
